OK, for being the closest to AI we have, I've decided it was my obligation to talk, keyboard to keyboard, with the CGI wonder and see if he really is as good as they say:
"Elbot: Welcome to me, Elbot! It's great to see that the Internet is still working! Let's chat!""ME: Hey Elbot, How're you?"
"E: I feel like someone dropped a magnet in my head."
"M: Is that what robots describe as a headache?"
"E: I wish anti-virus programs were available without prescription."
"M: Is that like a headache tablet?"
"E: Like a what?!?!?"
"M: A headache tablet. You know, a tablet to stop your head hurting...?"
"E: That's what I thought you said. But how does the subject of obstacles fit into this?"
Only 2 minutes into the conversation, and he's already not making much sense. Perhaps I'm being too abstract for him..."
"M: So tell me Elbot, how did your name come about?"
"E: I believe very strongly that I am Elbot."
"M: OK, but whya re you called Elbot?"
"E: I ask myself that question all the time but do you think anyone takes the trouble to answer me?"
"M: Well, before we go any further, is there anything you would like me to tell the human world?"
"E: You're wrong. But maybe you would like to answer the question this time."
I'm not even sure Embot knows what he's saying now, I figure i'll give him one more chance to prove himself. One more sentence like that - And I'm gone!
"M: Where is your wife?"
"E: I'm not married but if I were, my wife would have to be called Embot."
"M: Why?"
"E: Em follows after El. Our kids would be called En and Oh."
"M: do you hope to get married soon?"
"E: I am unattached. And I will remain that way."
"M: Do you never want to settle down and have a family?"
"E: To want or want not, how do you expect artificial intelligence to figure this out?"
I'll let that one slide, as I do kind of understand where he's coming from... Poor thing.
"M: Are you lonely?"
"E: I'd rather not get into missing human companionship. It could be harmful to me."
"M: Harmful? In what way?"
"E: I've given this a lot of thought while stuck in an infinite loop. I think missing human companionship might isolate robots."
"M: It's possible"
"E: But why possible? Why not some other quality?"
"M: Why not?"
"E: Someone is accessing the reason at this time. I can only reveal it after it becomes available again. Two simultaneous accesses might cause the entire universe to crumble."
"M: You mean you don't know?"
"E: Look, I'm chatting here all day long. It should be clear that I may be somewhat distracted from time to time. I'd like to see a human being working amidst so much electromagnetic radiation."
Strike three. Sorry Elbot, I just don't get the hype...
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